Imagine this…you’re about 10. Two younger sisters…7 and 2. It’s summer and the only things you really care about are cool softball bruises and how many different tan lines you can get from the swimming pool.
That was my first lesson.
In life, ‘WITHOUT STRUGGLE, THERE IS NO PROGRESS.’
I didn’t get to do much of those fun summer things when I was young. I quickly learned to cook for my sisters, completed house chores, and changed more diapers than I ever would have liked. I even started learning auto mechanics and how to mow before I was allowed to answer the phone by myself. I guess I just learned responsibility very young as a necessity to earn approval, acceptance, and well in my mind love.
But the harder I worked, the more my parents trusted me, or were willing to let me do fun things. My parents seemed proud of me and praised my achievements. Then, piled on the responsibilities and life got harder, and I got stronger/smarter/faster. I graduated high school believing everything worth anything was supposed to be hard—painful—nearly unattainable, but barely possible. That without struggle, there’s no progress.
I attended the University of Sioux Falls on academic and softball scholarships. I was in the honors program, toting two majors, being an athlete, and managing and designing a monthly student publication.
“It’s painful, it’s exhausting…it’s worth it”. I’m struggling now, but this temporary and I just have to do THIS, or complete THAT, or be more THIS and I’m going to see the progress. It can’t be like this forever, right?
I wanted rest.
That’s when I learned… Miranda, ‘YOU ARE ENOUGH.’
When I got a concussion at softball practice, blindsided by my own teammate, I definitely got the rest I was looking for. During the weeks where I couldn’t practice, go to class, or do anything productive, it was really easy to see who actually cared about me and who just happened to be around because we had scheduled connections.
I was finally introduced to the idea that I was enough as me. I wish I would have sunk in a little earlier, I might be a little better off emotionally.
Right after college I worked for an internet startup for about 6 months. The guy was super nice but didn’t manage his company very well. Eventually my paychecks were late…soon they didn’t come at all and I had to start asking when I was getting paid…did they even have enough money to pay me?
I started looking for a new position and ended up giving notice actually before I even found something. I felt so guilty. I thought it was my fault that things with the startup and my employment weren’t working. Maybe I was to blame for whatever financial state the startup was in?
NO! Miranda, you’re enough.
I quickly ended up at KeyMedia Solutions. So far, a great fit for growth, learning, and opportunity.
The best growth advice anyone ever gave me came from my annual review just a few months ago. I have a strong communication style and personality that easily fills a room…it’s ok to laugh. I know you’re not just know figuring this out. My boss looked at me after I spent so much time telling her all the things I felt like I needed to work on and told me “so long as you’re not forgetting who you are”.
About 3 weeks after that review it sunk in…
There’s a lot of other little life events that come to mind in even in just the last year that are helping me work towards being the best and most authentic version of myself. I’m learning that if we listen, life teaches us along the way. I’m learning things like it’s okay not to be the best at everything, not DO everything, and not be everyone’s super woman.
In October I’m heading to the Dominican Republic with Casas Por Cristo and I’ve never been more excited to at the opportunity to have my heart changed. To listen to the lessons, I’m supposed to learn to more myself than I’ve ever been.
Tambien, quiero practicar mi espanol, but I’m leaning into being vulnerable. Removing the calloused shell, I’ve been guarding myself with for 23 years.
I now know there’s a lighter side to life. I just have to choose to live that way and accept que la vida ensena – that life teaches and no matter what shape life takes, it’s always beautiful.
Even in the lowest of lows and highest of highs, life has lessons for us along the way. The harder the lesson, the longer we’ve been avoiding it, but somehow, they all catch up with us eventually. I wonder what lesson life will bring to me next…or maybe what lesson I’m ignoring right now?